Soft addictions are such an interesting concept to me for two reasons:
1.) They are generally socially acceptable
2.) They are insidious
I took a lot a notes when I read this book and it gives you a lot to think about between readings. The two main ideas are to challenge your thinking before giving in to a soft addiction and to make a decision about how you want to live and be called the One Decision. My One Decision was that I am Awake. I Am Engaged. No more zoning out. The reason I picked up this book was to help me curb my seemingly endless habit of snacking at work and just to have a better food relationship in general.
Couple things I realized:
1.) I have a lot of performance anxiety at work.
2.) I am addicted to self help books.
When I decided to be Awake and Engaged I realized that my urge to walk to the break room and grab a snack always happened when I was uncomfortable about something at work. And theses are not major things so they tend to happen a lot. So rather than delaying the task I just dived right in. The outcome would be exactly the same without a bowl of pretzels, cheese puffs or dark chocolate covered cashews in my mouth. I also realized I was telling myself some pretty tall tales about my work performance after I got a really good review and was completely shocked and thought my boss was lying. There is a general train of thought in my head called the Anxiety Express. The stops are You are Dumb, You are Letting Everyone Down, Whatever You are Doing Right Now is Wrong. It’s completely absurd and my general response if is pretty much “If I was screwing it up that baldy someone would say something.”
I felt bad about my self help book addiction when I didn’t actually finish reading ANY of them. Even this one, I still have 77 pages. What a loser! Like you are so broken you can’t even finish a book about it! But I realized a couple years ago, I’m not broken and only just recently figured out that I am unfulfilled.
Huge difference. I think I can survive being broken and still be whole. But being unfulfilled leaves a hole that gets filled with something rarely beneficial. For me it’s been relationships, alcohol and food. Then I buy books to figure out why I feel so crappy. Why do I carry all this excess weight from stuffing down my feelings? So many unread diet books.
See, what I really like to do is write. That makes me happy. Not writing makes me freakin miserable. Hence the self help books. Well, not anymore. Because now, I read for fun and learning not because I am broken and most importantly, I write because I have to. And even if it sucks, that’s okay.
So even though I didn’t ready every page I still got a lot out of this book. I would say it’s given me great tools to make better decisions that will be impactful for the long run.